Tag Archives: troubled teen

Defiant Teens and Parents can be Friends

Teens and Friends

One of the most significant factors contributing to a child’s success or failure is their choice of friends. That may sound simplistic but in reality a teen is not going to hang around with someone who doesn’t share their same value system. If a teen has been taught that it is not right to steal, and he is with someone who shoplifts, he or she will more than likely begin to move away from that friend. This is also true of other negative behaviors like substance abuse, smoking, drinking etc. The old adage, “Birds of a Feather” is basically a true statement.

Parents, Teens, and Friends

If possible parents should assist their child with their choice of friends. Obviously this is not always possible, but it is possible to make a teens life easier when they choose better friends. For example if a teen wants to go out with some friends that are not too desirable, a parent could say, “Why don’t you call __________ a positive friend and I will take you to the movies and pick you up”. This option is more likely to work when the child is younger. It is crucial that a parent stay involved in their child’s life as long as possible. If a parent is not spending enough time with their child they will fill their time with someone or something else. Parents should take every opportunity to get to know their children’s friends. If parents will also take the time to make their children’s friends welcome in their home it will pay rich dividends in the future. It might become annoying to their child that their friends always want to come to their house to hang out, but that is a positive thing from a parent’s standpoint.

Teens and Parents can be Friends

This topic is delicate and needs to be considered very carefully. It is easy to try to treat a teen like one of your friends. It is very important that a parent child barrier still exist. This means that while you and your teen are comfortable hanging out together the parental role still needs to be present. Some parents in an effort to stay close to their teen have taken the friendship concept way too far when they actual smoke marijuana with their teen. Some will participate in similar inappropriate activities. While it is a good idea to bond with a teen, keeping things on an adult level will gain more respect, and actually turn out much better than becoming a negative friend for your child. The best rule of thumb is if you are questioning if the activity you are considering doing with your teen is ok, it probably isn’t. The parents should take the lead in planning activities and guiding them in a positive direction. It is also very helpful if the parent will coordinate their efforts with the parents of the other teens.

Military Schools And Troubled Teens

Yes SIR!, No SIR!

Military schools have been around for over 100 years, they are an important part of the history of this great country. For a young man hopeful of a military career, military school is a logical step in the right direction. The potential military man more than likely has always wanted to be a soldier. This comes from a family history of military service or in some boys it just clicks when they see a man in uniform for the first time. Once they have their mind made up they begin to eat sleep and drink military. Things they want for Christmas and birthdays are centered around his desired life style. The movies and toys they want are usually based on military themes. This type of cadet is different than the defiant teen that may find him or herself in a military school.

No SIR I Don’t Care SIR!

The truly defiant teen will typically have no respect for the military lifestyle. They will usually fight the system with a lot of “what are you going to do about it” type statements. There are two types of military schools. Some will accept a defiant teen and work to curb his our her defiance. This is a long battle and may test the metal of the strongest military man. The other type of military school will not even consider enlisting a defiant teen. Some of these types of elite military schools require letters of recommendation, good grades, and a willing soldier from the start. The willing soldier loves the military lifestyle and will follow along, doing what ever is asked of him or her.

Troubled Teens And Military Schools

The question that surfaces then is, “what can be done with a defiant troubled teen”? Are troubled teens ever accepted in a military school? The answer is yes, sometimes. There are a few true military schools that will accept defiant teens. Some of these schools will charge tuition for the quarter, year, or semester in advance. If the cadet is expelled the money paid in advance is non-refundable. A lot of the military schools have gone out of business over the years, but there are still a few good academies to choose from. The tricky part is finding a military style school that is willing to try to help a teen move from defiant to compliant. There are only a few give us a call if this is what you are looking for.

U.S. Military Requires A High School Diploma

If a teen has an interest in the military they will need to have a high school diploma. This is challenge for a teen that has been kicked out of school, or that is not applying themselves in school. It may be necessary to place the troubled teen in another type of school prior to enrolling them in a true military school. It may not even be a possibility to ever enroll the teen in a military school. A military school is obviously not required to enlist in the military, it is just a head start toward becoming an officer. Another option for a defiant teen may be enrollment in a boot camp style program in preparation for a life in the military. We work with a boot camp program staffed with former military personnel. They are happy to take defiant teens and help them move toward a career in the military.

At Risk Youth Warning Signs – Teen Help

At Risk Youth Warning signs

Parents struggling with an at risk youth are usually not concerned about the warning signs preceding this type of youth behavior. We will try to point out behaviors that usually accompany the beginning of a child heading down a negative path. If a parent can detour negative behavior early enough, they may be able to save themselves and their child from the consequences of their poor choices. We will list some key indicators that usually accompany a youth moving in the wrong direction.

Is your youth huffing?

Has your youth ever run away?

Does your youth disrespect those in positions of authority?

Has your child ever spoken about suicide?

Is your child sexually active?

Have you ever found drugs in your youth’s possession?

Has your youth ever come home intoxicated or high?

Is your child refusing to talk to one or both parents?

Has your youth changed friends?

Has your child’s grades recently dropped?

Does your child seem depressed?

Does your child have a hopeless attitude? (what’s the use?)

Does your child sleep excessively?

This list is not conclusive, and if your youth is displaying behaviors associated with depression, it is highly recommended that he or she be seen by a professional.

At Risk Youth Depression

Depression if not treated can lead to self mutilation and even suicide. If you suspect your child is depressed, get them into either your family Dr. or a mental health professional. There are few things less tragic than teen suicide. We are not qualified to give advice on this dangerous topic. The best course to take is to seek help immediately. It is always better to seek help early in cases of teen depression that could possible lead to suicide. Interwoven through our site is the importance of parental involvement.

When a parent is involved and has a good relationship with their youth, they will notice even gradual changes in attitudes and behaviors. When a teen begins flirting with negative behavior it is always better to get involved as soon as possible. It is sad when parents do not pay close enough attention and do not notice the gradual decent that leads to negative behavior.